Good to read your experiences with online flying, Andrew, despite of the fact that it has been a view years ago. Has the online-community changed since? I don't think so: still there are a lot of pilots (at this moment online 655 on IVAO and 426 on VATSIM) who all made there first step online and experienced the same problems as you did six years ago and probably still do. If I go back to my first experience online, a lot of years ago, after I finally had conquered the problems how to get online, I had no idea how to behave and when I was called by a controller on one of the bussiest airports (Schiphol) to 'state my message'. I paniced and disconnected immedeately. Only after several months of building up enough courage and studying several tutorials, I tried again, somewhere in Africa, where I hoped to avoid ATC. The controller, who wasn't too busy, did a great job: he helped me through the procedures and - what's more important - gave me enough confidence to get online the next time. A few things he mentioned were very important: all controllers are active flyers too, so they know what it is to be a newbie; online flying tries to get as close to reality as possible, but... we are and stay simmers; it's a hobby and the purpose of it all is to have fun.
I'm flying online now for, I think, 12 years. I'm still learning and the only way to get more experienced is to keep on flying online. And, of course, with the help from controllers and as far as I'm concerned with the help from our Euroharmony colleagues.
I hope to meet yo soon online!
Peter